by Raj van Deltaschrift
A secret dossier has been leaked by the Ministry for Transport, pertaining to the fact that the incomplete highways and bridges scattered throughout outer Beijing are not in fact due to insufficient funding caused by corruption in the Ministry, but are in fact part of an elaborate plan to reduce the number of cars on Beijing's roads by the 2008 Olympics.
The "Highway to Nowhere Plan '08" was seemingly realised to create a series of empty or "decoy" roads and bridges in an attempt to lure Beijing drivers off the more congested routes. Drivers were expected to follow the incomplete routes until the highway literally ran out under them, thus incapacitating their vehicle and removing it permanently from the road. The dossier has been met with widespread condemnation from all levels of local and central government, not only for its slightly higher then usual level of malevolence but also for its lack of foresight in seemingly underestimating the intelligence of the average Beijing driver, something previously believed impossible.
Over the course of the two year plan only 32 drivers "fell" for the ruse, which is deemed an unacceptably low yield for an initiative costing upwards of RMB 100 million. The minister for transport was unavailable for comment as he is currently holidaying at his villa in the Philippines.